“Was she at the party with her friends, coworkers, or family?” When you do this, your brain starts coming up with useful questions that can keep a conversation going. Instead of worrying about how you sound or what others think of you, focus on getting to know the person you’re talking to. This kind of negative self-talk will not help you be more outgoing. What should I say? I don’t want to come off as a loser!” And she seems to have loads of friends, too. “Uh oh, she’s probably much more social than I am, and she’s going to realize that I’m not as outgoing as she is. Taking a more realistic view makes the world less threatening. In this case, we can see that beliefs like “Everyone else is more relaxed than me” simply aren’t correct.
Recalibration also shows us when our incorrect, unhelpful beliefs don’t hold true. Just like you, they sometimes have bad days or moments of self-doubt.Ĭhanging your perspective can help you see the world more realistically. Some people in the photo appear confident, but they all have insecurities, even if they are good at hiding them. But you cannot know how they feel inside, so making these kinds of comparisons isn’t helpful. If someone else appears calm, it’s easy to conclude that they are relaxed. The problem is that we judge people by their observable behavior.
We often assume that we are more nervous and awkward than everyone else. 8 of 10 feel uncomfortable being the center of attention.(Only 4% of women feel comfortable describing themselves as beautiful. 5 out of 10 don’t like the way they look.1 in 3 millennials say they have no close friends.1 in 10 have had social anxiety at some point in their lives.
0 kommentar(er)
